“I hope you are doing well. I apologise that I wasn’t able to contact you. I had a terrible morning. The Judge I mentioned before… the one with the grenade launcher… committed suicide. The Trial Court was in chaos and… once again I’m lost. I felt really sick all day. I’m sure you had a lot of work as well but… If you don’t mind and if you have any free time, can we meet up tonight? I just need to talk with you in person.”

   Jibran’s face became painfully icy. His mouth twitched at the bitter saliva he felt; his fingers were covered in cold, unpleasant dampness before he started to shake violently from the disgust he felt for himself. He should’ve opened this message, not being a fucking bitch over a nuisance!

   Seraing… Seraing needed him. He was always there to listen to Jibran’s nonsensical ramblings and now, when it was his turn…

   But then he realised, by the time he got this message, he had already left the base. So even if he had opened it yesterday, he would have been able to neither meet with Seraing nor call him, for the situation he was in, and for the distance they’ve travelled already. Messages could get lost in the void when people were too far away, or only were able to get them when they were close enough to the sender. 

But he couldn’t just sit around. At least, he can try. He quickly started to type.

 “Please, forgive me. I left the base. I’m coming back with Lu Feng. We have the sample. An Zhe is not here. Once we got home, come to me immediately.  It’s about fourteen hours. I will wait for you.”

   He sent the message; however, there was no indication that the recipient had received it. And even if he did, he probably won’t get an immediate answer from Seraing, unless they reach the base by the time the young Judge would send it.

   The sickness stayed with him, he felt horrible, his head ached, he was nauseous and the journey seemed extremely long. The boy, Xi Bei had woken up, but he strangely glanced over at Lu Feng many times and stayed silent when Jibran tried to speak with him. So it was no fun. Soon enough the boy fell asleep once more. The doctor didn’t blame him. By the end of the day, when it was night a long time ago, he almost let himself sink into a dream as well, but the pain in his body woke him up instantly. He never really spent so much time sitting in a car before. Definitely didn’t like it one bit.

He almost felt happy coming back to this chaotic city.

   In the past, the only light source at night was the aurora above the base. Now that the situation was so tense, the Main City decided to leave the street lights on, even at night, and there was actually some life on the streets as well – mostly soldiers were walking by, carrying resources from one place to another. 

   Jibran knew, now that the Arbiter had come back, he was not going to be able to rest for a while. And after all the things that happened to him, his mood was very bad. Maybe he should’ve stayed at that city ruin for a while to get some sleep… maybe Seraing would come to rescue him…

   He wanted to laugh at this stupid idea, but he pressed his lips together instead before he crawled out from the armored vehicle. They’ve parked right next to the city walls.

 “Colonel Lu, the United Front Center wants you to come with us and…”

 “Not now.”

   Lu Feng got out before him, so the doctor wasn’t aware of a few things. Just when he reached his friend and the soldier who was talking to him, just then Jibran saw them.

   The Trial Court was waiting for the Arbiter right at the gates. They stood in orderly lines, and as soon as Lu Feng came up to them and stopped right in front of them, they simultaneously clapped their heels together and saluted him.

   Seraing was there, of course. He was in the middle, taking the leadership position, as he should. He stood the closest to the Arbiter. In the bright, cold light of the closest, tall lamp, his face seemed ghostly pale, and he had very dark circles around his eyes. The brim of his hat made it worse, casting a wide, deep shadow onto his face.

 “Seraing.” The Arbiter greeted him. Jibran was startled. Will he keep his promise and compliment him? “The team is smaller. What happened?”

   Jibran’s heart pounded faster and louder. Even breathing was difficult for some reason – probably the self-blame he felt – but he tried to stay calm. Despite all of his efforts, however, he wasn’t able to look away from the young Judge; he was absolutely outstanding among all the other members, even when he seemed to be tired and sick.

   Right… he just lost one of his colleagues. Lu Feng’s question reminded Jibran of his own message to this poor boy. Seraing probably also felt sickness towards himself, for different reasons than Jibran.

   The urge to step to him, to speak to him, to hear his voice, to hug him, to… kiss him, and take him into his room and tie him up, and do many sorts of things, after he apologised… it hit him so heavily, that he froze in his spot, as his foot was pinned to the ground and he longed so much for a single glance of that man… that it was almost painful.

   He never experienced these sorts of feelings. He felt weak now. He kind of wanted to pass out, so that Seraing would take him away in his arms again… he never felt this wish to be in someone’s arms before either.

He might have gone crazy. He definitely did…

   Seraing had spoken – to Lu Feng, of course. His voice was like a refreshing rain after a dry week of sunshine, even if it was hoarse a bit. Jibran shivered. The young Judge’s eyes were not looking at him at all, despite Jibran standing not far away from Lu Feng.

   The Arbiter gave his instructions for a meeting between the Trial Court members, and he sent the soldiers away with a message that they were going to touch up with the United Front Center soon. If the soldiers had any objections, they were silent and couldn’t do anything to stop Lu Feng. Or they didn’t dare. Although the Arbiter didn’t have his pistol, there were many more Judges, who could’ve helped him out if he needed one. The Arbiter’s authority was still outclassing. 

   The group of the Trial Court was loosened up, but they still kept a certain distance from each other, as they turned on their heels and with the leading of the Arbiter, they just… left.

Without Seraing casting a single look towards Jibran.

It hurt so much. Jibran suddenly wanted to curl up in his spot and cry.

He actually had to slap himself in the face to snap out of this self-pity.

   He deserved it anyway. He ignored Seraing for long hours. It was not a surprise if Seraing had enough of him. When he wished for his presence so much, the doctor was not here, and now, as Jibran wished his presence so much, Seraing left. He has no right to feel disappointed or hurt. He shouldn’t be surprised if the young Judge will stop sending him messages.

   With a sore throat and stinging eyes, feeling worn out, he tried to ramp up his energy to go – he was already standing alone at the gates. The soldiers had no interest in him anymore and the Trial Court was already a street away from him – but before he made one step forward, he was stopped right away.

   There was one unfamiliar, very young Judge, running towards him. Jibran frowned when the person reached him.

 “Captain Seraing sent this to you.” With both hands, he respectfully handed a small envelope to him that looked like it had a tiny ball or a rock shoved inside. Jibran took it, nodded, and watched, as the Judge ran back to the already faraway group of his colleagues.

 “Captain Seraing.” He murmured to himself, and a dumb smile curled onto his lips. How classy. Captain, huh?

   A strong, cold wave of wind swept through the street. Jibran shivered again and this unpleasant experience awakened him. The nights were always cold, but they were even colder nowadays; he didn’t want to wander around the streets, so headed back to the Twin Towers as well. At least, there were a few of his people who had greeted him earnestly.

   As soon as he set foot in the building, he got a message that the Lighthouse and the United Front Center were about to hold a meeting in fifteen minutes with the Trial Court. He knew, this would happen, but hoped for a bit of rest still… at least until he opened his package.

   Then, he froze in his steps for a second and with newly found energy, he jumped into a side corridor of the current floor where he was. There was no one around him now, and he leaned to the wall in the dim light that had come from the main corridor. He broke the sealing, and he already saw that there was a letter in the envelope, but first he took out the small object. Then he licked his lips.

   This was such a weird coincidence. Where did Seraing get these candies from? It was the exact same one that Jibran got in his childhood from Madam Lu. He never even saw them once he graduated from the Garden of Eden. His heart was somehow filled with warmness, and quickly took off the wrapping, and threw the candy into his mouth. It was hard and sour first, but became sweeter as the outer layer melted from his saliva.

   Enjoying his sweet snack, he unfolded the letter as well. It was just a short one.

   The first thing he noticed was that Seraing’s writing was spectacular, without a single mistake, with perfect shapes and letters of the same size, in straight lines on the blank paper… Then his stomach once again turned but now the feeling was just as hot as his face.

“Forgive me for this outdated way of texting, I know, I could just wait until you come back and text or talk to you. But I wanted to answer your last message so long ago and I can’t wait any longer. It’s frustrating. I just heard you are out of the base, it’s even more frustrating. You should be in my arms. I miss you already.

You don’t have to flirt with me – I’m not good at making people do things if I’m being honest. I can do the flirting part if you like this way. But in exchange, you have to make the first step in kissing, sunshine. Would you?”

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